srawmann cathexis

when we destroy, we grow anew
  mythos of eros
  we  spark because we let ourselves.

oh plato , how thee  tempt me with thy
divine love. the eros in  erring,
 the devil in lived have rent me wry
and  fair ended. there's a sparing

way you look at me, as if eternity
 were a legend and we the knot
of boredom   unloosed. verily
i pledge  thee  always  and forgot

.the way you break that vow
here it comes again, a pledge
mouse mouthed, ears of caracal
a   half eaten carcass hidden on the ledge.

 nevermind i fall  for serendipities
a tree in autumn, a sea to rock
by now i should  be full of antipathies
or had      my fill of  barnyard  cock

but  eros  shy and plato  sly
  the two adance and  pairing
make   valentine drip  winter sky
with  red  tipped arrows, airing.

portal on a taurus moon

never too late to romaniticise
the capilliaries of  redundancy and warmth
she takes the  shot  of white medicine
as a cure. what  ails is immaterial.

stuff of  stubbornness
born of calculus and lime.
a third party wanted  to come
into  play but the  doors 
closed  automatically.

winter and  its great  divide.



the metaphors wanted new puppets
after this one destroyed  itself. seasonless
as paradise.  seasonless  and  unsalted.
it died of water  intoxication.  electrolyte
imbalances. chemistry.


what can they cook up
this time  round?





(8****)






infinitudes of aching back.
a slow  burn in favor of  metastic  shine
lie  down  in  a feather
wake up  in lyme.












*()))













while steeping the tea
a bound book of titles
appears on the  leaves.
drams dreaming  themselves.

arrange  into the passage:

1 part  crinoline skirt
5  pathways to peristatis
2 pc  unbroken spine
1  spoon, unknown size
3 parts  rhyme.  you may substitute  reason.


combine  these  into a soup  du  jour.
add a  lens, myopic dystopic
lie  down and wait  for the  timer to  begin.

soon  its horns  are  evident
in the  evening sky, shooting morning a grin.

avenues into the m ystic closed due to temporary construction schedules

wcw talks  about cold plums
and  forgiveness. he only asks
it  of the person, never of the plum.

dogs  dont think like humans.
you can't translate it  says o ne skool.
then it's a human lens with metaphors 
becoming animal. another  skool
says if you  have a babelfish
anything can be translated  in a series of  words.
you don't have to learn the language
it can be physchic. but what colors
penetrate the  eyes of  a blade of grass.

















(*(*(*

all  of you love the  misaligned
the  disinclined the pauvre  shine
of the contagious.  so enviable
in   pitifulness.

but don't touch it
  it kills slowly

and i just wanna say it dies that  way.
correlative. no one really wants
to  be exposed in a real and personal way
to that  reality.     be the one to  stop this madness
one way or the other.


i just don't wanna  be caught
in the in betwisting . would you understand
the  intermittent balance of looking
under the  doorway  to find  out where

the  light's   gone against opening it

to the blinding?

 

* *^

my pipes are  all clogged
but  i get high anyway.

why don't you  be  productive
why you no have a productive  day?
montetize this bitch if you're gonna do it anyway
 
















&*^




why  is ampersand  so proprietary?















*(&&






miss the  musings of the distanced
my own life so  myopic
even dali  spoke little to me.
he opened the door into personal psyche
and it's all been  redux and  facade since.


 

(*****(





i like the stars better anyway. 
hit them with my   fuck you  finger













(*(*(*(*(*(*(*(








think it's about time for me
to take a break  from  love
i can't hold her  anymore
distrust the rising
anticipate the crash.

love  doesn't kill at all.
it dies man
and every death takes eons.
eons.














**(((***(**(*(*









you ask how i am
and i don't know how to answer that
in terms of you. i miss you still.
got your credit on my dresser
the  addy to send it on's in my inbox.
i should make you wait
 but it  would never  be long enough.


what does love kill?
hope?
ok hope it kills the spider slow
but one day
in most  ppl
it's dead.



if you  kill it  good
you never have to love again.

do you see?
do you?

















(**90777)98)(**













dont  really wanna be there













**((*(((*()))(&*))(((**))(((

she rises when  he does
puts on the  coffee lights
the  pipe. he's shaving
in the head, she  wants to open
a porthole  and let the smoke out
seawind in. he  kisses  her
at her tippytap  wishes
the next great  novel on  her.
 

()*





i'd  like to retire into writing
go  for a post  production
edit. get this  thing off  to the printer
etronic and deciduous.

the granddaughter bangs on my door.
i pretend  i'm not available
but it fucks with my concentration
and magic.

i'd be there  with you now
but it never existed.

bi polar

when i got home i dressed the toddler
put shoes on her feet and took her
to the pond to feed ducks and turtles.
we watched the moon come up,
small grin in the sunset sky.

then we  cooked dinner,  she and i
frying up steak n boilin rice. momma
was txting someone, breakin up
or makin up i'm n ot sure. 

she  ate well  my golden haired love
and t ho she wanted t o help  with the
dishes i had to give her goodnite kisses.
thought momma might do em but no

she had a lotta  tv shows to go.
so i cleaned the kitchen good, 
scoured counters and sinks, swept
the floor, cleaned the ink

offf the cabinets --baby  bored  art.
thought about asking  mom to help
but i remembered the last time.
would this start  a battle? cause a yelp?

better to do it  without. sanity is iffy
when the moon's  just coming out.

waterflight

finches  drawn to  laurel's  hard berried limbs
like men to a  slut. tiny flights, needle beaked

     what are you looking for?   
     whaddaya got?
      i got it all, baby. brains, beauty, bitchiness 

something on the lee side of the bushes
out of view
draws the birds one by one:
heron
mallard
one ibis &
another
commorant's  swift snakey swim
and helicopter  hover
gull



     does it feel like we're speaking telepathically?
      yeah, it does. you?


an osprey keens, weary of flight and skim
and empty talons  

     so...but have you ever  been in love?
     yeah i been hurt

an orange tabby with a mouthfull
steps along the bank looking for a quiet
spot to picnic


      do you believe in anything?
       destiny...and a sword.

finches chatter and scatter  seed pods
they ring like  gravel on the car's roof.










   

fatale

Rhesus monkeys Roku and Hex are two of the world's first lab-generated chimeric primates—each is composed of cells representing as many as six distinct genomes. Fakebook, a Facebook look-alike, is rapidly becoming a popular teaching tool for science, history, and other school subjects

 endless string of men
following me while i'm on to the next
booty call on speed dial
mr fix me up at the dinner table
i tell you i wanna saturday nite guy
and you disappear into the woods
until wednesday.
  your hands  draw  me back
the way you turn a cresent wrench
pull  on  a bad shoulder
push your finger into my back.

was it you who called me seven
then dropped me  to a three?
your  desire fades so quickly
no time  to find my heaven.

this femme finds
she can remind
him where to find
what was  behind

in the how that  is now
kiss and tell take a bow
rattlesnake rebirth while
past  and future slough





















*^()














i'm sure i'll take a break soon
she  thinks, the poems pile
under  the moon, she  thinks
i wanted to get to the swoon
she thinks it's  coming a mile
away, the gods sweet hijinks
play  and ripen in  nights of june















&*6










inhale  the  scent  of  bread
my sweet  i bake it just for you
add  a soundrack lightheaded
and sad E minor with a view.

so many times i've smiled  at  you
embraced  you before thinking
and for my pains i'm in a stew
of  sluttery and  blank blinkings.

what? you  ask. or rather, don't
silence makes  our after meal smoke
from this  i've learned  will makes won't
desire you  with the morning's toke

done done  on to the next one
looking  for  a heart  attack
 a final exit   from the bones
onto a higher track.


if femme v  slut's about who loves
and  whom is  merely smitten
i will take the lighter  road,  my hooves
look hot   in  this sex kitten.
























(*)*()))))))))>>>>>>













in  lieu of what the girl really wants.

the rote harness of the world or the whirl of angels

Fynn:

do more of donation and evangelism

10:45 AM me: what kind of evangelsim? as in, tents and revivals?

 Fynn: no..

  visit poor homes

  preach and donate..

 me: ahhh preaching for christ?

 Fynn: yea........

10:46 AM Loving your neighbour as your self really matters

  and that is what I talk about.

 me: well yes, that's true. chirst said whatever you do unto the least of these you do unto me.

10:47 AM Fynn: yea..

 me: and also what you said. but i'm seriously not a christian

 Fynn: thats not a problem..

  I am freak in bed my self.. I dont belief in Hell..

  God wont create a hell for his children

 me: if no hell then no heaven. god is you and me

10:51 AM you didn't ask, but i'm a zennist. a believer in the tao

10:52 AM Fynn: i didnt ask

  tell me more.

10:53 AM me: in my travels with zen i came to the epiphany of grace. instead of god being outside of us, god, genderless, eternal, the everythihg, is both in us and outside us so that there is no outside or inside it's all just now, happening , being

10:54 AM Fynn: ok

10:55 AM I will like you..

 me: so the idea of sin, heaven and hell only apply to how we make or perceive our lives. where were you born?

10:56 AM Fynn: Venice.

  there is hell yea.

 me: there is heaven as well. in this world universe opposites are the way of being.

10:57 AM Fynn: ok..

  How old are you again?

 me: 52

  you?

10:58 AM Fynn: nice.

  I am 54 ..

  whre were you born

 me: florida

 

disintoxication

sittin on the okc cloud
the question is would you considrer dating
 someone whose spirituality is the primary focus
of their lives? i think i did. would i again?
maybe. it depends on the matrix they use.

catholics are difficult. they  see god as outside themselves
even many who've left the church and look at the soul
differently. to them "god" can't 
be the aconceptual wellspring. i wouldn't be able to relate
to a baptist or a muslim either, if it were their
driving force, i'm pretty sure it would drive
a wedge. any religion that imprinted
on a child can be devastating to mind expansion. i believe
one must feel their own truth. i was raised christian
but it didn't take . lucky to be a free thinker
able to pick and choose from what ws introduced
to me in later life. i'm so glad my parents did that for  me.
or rather, didn't go the other way. religions
can limit our accesss to   spirituality.
 


i just know what feels right to me. i wouldn't fight you over it
but i won't give my inch either. spirituality is such a personal thing
which  kinda drives my point home 




just sayin.
















&^$##





reading of bataille, the beheading
society that could  find no executioner
and thus dis banded as war began. gorges
and his fascination with the
cults of ecstatic pain.  

watts points out that the same nerves
carry pain as pleasure.
it's our interpretations
that make the difference.
surfing the edge of the orgasm
or the caress of the knife
until sensation becomes
overload.release
short circuit eros





gorges was  outre  for his time.
today you can watch it
on freeporn download dot  com
which fetish would you like?
nothing is taboo anymore.

nothing is sacred.that's what happens
when you kill god.



 ^*^((%








what will the pendulum's
swing bring , sway  , sharp, sickle.








*)(&)





no one understands time. i wanted to steal
a line about it from you but i forgot my journal.













*()(*












the most erotic moment was
when you and i disappeared
inside each other
home at last.























*




so the question. i answered postively
hope it doesn't bring  on some jesus freak.