butterfly bone lament

can you please tell me why it is i can see you so clearly
when you cannot see me at all? am i then a ghost? wanted

to tell you
that i still love you the kind
of way that drove me to your place
with a coconut and a plea
the way your hand lay on my shoulder
like a promise
i had to stop believing

wanted to be
the heart in your palm
leftover after after you threw the rock
into the sea. the hard place
always ahead of you, i wanted to be
the pillow you rest with, i wanted to be
the light in the window, all yellow.


i hate that i can picture you, on our causeway your cause
way my cause way the causality effect of ownership



i hate that i can picture the expression on your face
as you bend for the rock, and grasp it your hand
close your eyes, strong nose pointed to the sea
sniffing memories like shells rolling in the surf
breaking up, making the sound of wind and string i hate
that i see you pour your anguish into the rock
your hatred, your desire to let goooo
also the way i see
your eyes open, your yes succeed, the windup

the arm pulled back , thrown foward the arc of your back
the arc of  the rock headed far into the blue sky channel
your eyes search the surf to make sure it
drowned, lost, just another rock among the debris
of honeymoon causeway, just another story, tossed
and thrown away. i hate that i am part of that story
that i am old and past and watching you
now, as clearly as if i'd been there,
say goodbye to love.

new particle discovered

"A nuclear particle was uncovered by Finnish scientists today. The new particle, dubbed the "grooveon" is said to be one of the most fundamental forces yet discovered."













take two superconducting
sloughs of skin and point them
at each other. add music and rebellion
hormones and speed.  break out your
meters and get ready to record
the collision. scientists have
agreed that the desire generated
will create whole new
universes.  so do
try this at home,
kiddies

an hour in the corners

i have managed to make it thus far
with no broken bones or homes or living
too close to the streets.

that's not what you wished but
it's ok cuz i fell in love with someone
who lost the same dream you did.

now he spends his time mourning.
i don't know how you spend yours
but it's not chasing the ring.

i guess it's easier that way.



\




()8




oh and hey

it bothers me some
that you haven't made me
the most beautiful girl in the world
but ms russia is a tough
competitor. this is why i'm keeping
the cookies in the bag. i've had
enough giving them away
to people who have no taste.



cookies. yum. that's seven.

scallops

two birds trace


each other thru

the rain, muons

exploded.



since i lost my guides

all skies are gray

hair and silver streak.



the news is tomorrow

we will all huddle

in the sand, join

hands. platforms

tankers and pipelines

rise to greet

our babies. now, that's

progress. i will go



on the off chance your hand

is removed from mine by less

latitude than 6 degrees,

lost in seperate swords.



rain drips from the trees

&. birds have long



since found shelter

on their own. i wonder why

i leave a window

cracked on steel water,

a shell softening but cold.

tying ribbons of storm in her hair

 three's nothing to sneeze at
flesh body spirit. wind moves
across  diagonal intentions
like a dead cell phone.

she saved these few from the last front.
pretended they were meant for special occasions
like forgotten  blue roses or trains on time.

she finds you now in pieces across the web
or was that  a web composed of pieces. her hair
was lost to chemo, the storm was another child

growing old and the ribbons were remnants
from your eyelashes.  she ties them together-
a caul for valentines day.

the mirror's vanity

it may be
that i have written
my last love
letter to you.


i can't tell, exactly
but i know how frustrating
it's been to receive them
when all you want is a friend.

a friend is gonna tell you
how it is. otherwise why bother?

my body insists on this hunger.
yours on a different one.


i will stop dancing with this pole
open my eyes and go home

you can call anytime
i'll answer if i'm near the glass.

shit, can't think of a title.

late for work again
i hope this sciatica
lesson works since nothing
much else does.

the pain runs down my leg
whenever i shift the clutch
higher , lower, a gear change
is agony. ibuprofen is my
best friend now.


makes it hard to metaphor things
pain is pain is pain. i'm beginning
to understand old age in a new way.

just keep slogging until the black comes.
also, if i keep my legs elevated, like
when i write? no pain.

see? i'm SPOSED
to be a writer. even
my body knows

amy comes from your room
and it makes me wonder
what messages you send yourself.


 i remember when we were grooving
on elton, you in maryland, me in the class
behind you. how many women did you
pass through, staying a while, longer.

eh, i'm really to the point of
wonder under a bullet in my hip.


and it's time to get ready for work now.