after six

we make love or
have sex depending
on your generation
or maybe we fuck. i've
been studying this desire
i have for him comes
and goes when i think of the future
where everything bleaches out
in possiblities or travels tracks
of trains and veins the ore and ors
the way things coulda mighta soldered in
shoulda been. there's the fire

which binds us some, but otherwise
only love it could be ashes
in our mouths
rubbed on the forehead as she exits
in bruises and stuffed backpack
i was thinking i'm doing her
a favor i was thinking she's way too young

they die out there. gotta learn the rulez
somehow. i never could teach the girl.

i wish i could reach the girl.
thorny pussy and metal gangrene
posse to tha rescue. i know you think
i won't make it mom, but i will
time i say to test them waters you've
been sleepin way too long.

what doesn't kill you
makes you stronger
what kills you kills me
you dn't even care i hear her wail
you are that cold

no daughter, you are that bold.
see how far your imperious ways get you
in the world. i'll be here if you
decide to change your mind.


and he sleeps steeped in the love
which could be hers. he is almost
as exasperating, but he tries
to be co operative. at least
when i'm in the room.
ironic snort from the peanut head.
i wish i had a coke.

oh get your mind out of the gutter.
i mean acceptance, i mean cooperation
with her. but she wants to be in charge.
i can't deal with that.
it's my house. there are rules
to which i've told you the reasons
and still you don't want to accept them.
so go. i can't handle the tearful scenes
the threats the awful way you try
to turn your pain into mine.
i have loved you since you were born.
i never meant to hurt you.
well, maybe twice. but it hurt me
as much.


rubber band

she holds it between her thumb
and finger in her left hand and
in her right, gingerly tight.
she pulls steadily in both directions
thinks of horses and ropes, criminals.
it stretches and thins, vibrates with tension she pulls
with a slight wince. thinks of burst balloons.
thinks of the phone ringing and ringing it
breaks snaps back
over her flesh leaves a red mark
across her knuckles
blue pulses in her wrist
she drops the flaccid pieces
on the floor.