the queen of the birds in water colors

she had closets
he had things to fill
them with. matches, gasoline.
when he moved in he rarely moved out
she was a stay at home worker b.
she waited to invert for him to leave
it wouldn't do, for him to see
what she did these lonely hours
drifting room to room sprinkling dust
from cocaine parties she'd
 read about in people. hey honey, hold on a sec
weren't these laser diodes on
yesterday? she answered lackadaisy
on the balcony, the only room left,
i don't know honey, how bout another drink
politely pleasing her way off the edge.

no it wasn't that way. he was scared.
last chance and she prettty much
couldn't care enough to fight. so if she has
a suitor on val's day, so be it. he suspected
from the beginning...

































(())***


namesake


the birds are trying to speak to me grandmother
they've flown into my yard two sundays running

wearing totems i sang to as a child, bearing children
away from one nightmare to another. (all mothers

are children the first time, grandmother, you
told me so, you promised!). one perched on the light

post across the street yelling, unheeded until someone said
is that an osprey? when i looked, it went silent

but remained on the post until clouds came up
over the lakes behind us and i went inside.

Sunday, i was with your great great grand daughter. i took her
to the pool to swim, because the day was bright

even though the water was colder
than coldsprings in  summer.

i call her otter. she calls me gramma.
on the way back home she runs

around the corner and out of sight.
i watch  a column of turkey buzzards

in gyre just above the road fronting my  trailer.
i turn the corner. the screened porch is empty

my car is parked under the aluminum roof,
her scooter- on its side in the drive.

 one of the buzzards dives below the roofline
 vanishes on the other side then swoops

back up in a grin joins the other gnats hanging
 in the sky. i wonder what

they're hunting, think of kittens
and small helpless things,

run to the door with a catch
 in my throat calling your name.