taradiddle
driving home from my sister's wedding when the first call
comes, you're starting a band with larry the cable guy
who you just convinced to buy
not one but two kick ass guitars ,that
way you can make money giving
him and junior
lessons, make that three guitars
cuz little larry got the matching one for
smaller hands now you're both
celebrating at the porthole
with drinks, he's buying and i'm
negotiating with the eighteen
wheelers outside of alachua, when
will you be back
you insist, are you coming back
tonight? i am currently 300 mi from home
but yes, i'll be there by one a.m. yes i'll call you
when i get there buh bye now, but you can't
wait-- outside of ocala
as i'm stopped for gas at a 7/11 the one
you may have been rescued in that time you ODd on tylenol
and vodka, i dunno it was
before i met you but
the resonance rings
loud as my phone and you sound drunker just
how many
drinks did larry buy you
? don't worry bout that i talked
i got it covered get this larry
is psyched , we are gonna rock you're either with me or
you're left behind you know it's a community
thing, we gotta get together
on this and i'll be there in an hour
and a half dammit
we can talk then but right now i gotta
line of traffic to get back into buhbye
third call
is just outside tampa, the fog is up
at the rest area, it looks like you
sound: misty, dreamlike, full of possible
car wrecks and swirling miracles are you home yet
i gotta come over. twenty minutes seriously
your voice is low and urgent and slurred so ok
i'm home
you stand in the kitchen, the fan revolves sickeningly above
your head, you sway, and sway some more like a man
on a rope you say what you see
in front of you is a ghost. the actual me is back
in my apartment with a bag over his head the actual me
died tonite
you sneer, he's dead. i touch you to convince
you you're lying but you insist no!
i called daddy tonite and daddy's gonna make it
all alright he's taking care of the rent
so i wrote a li'l check to amscottTM and you gotta see
what i bought; disappear
outside
i hear the jeep's door slam, then sounds of clunk
and wrestle from the kitchen window maybe
it's a new guitar, maybe you have a drunken
stirpper, maybe...you struggle with the door handle i could
help but i'm not gonna, i just want to sit
down and smoke a bowl, you
stumble in holding a box
with a round object inside and a tap
on top. you set the ball of beer
down on the floor, wipe blearshifting eyes
go back outside and return with
an unopened fifth of jack daniels, i don't understand
i say, your dad sent you money? NO, you dont LISTEn
to me i told you , i cashed a check at amscot
daddy will take care of me he said he said
and i'll be just like all those other frat boys
in izods & khaki with a fifty
dollar hair cut so
you proceed to try to use your ghosty
hands to insert the tap into the ball o beer but
it's not going in cuz you're too drunk
to see come ON l help me
with this thing but i don't drink beer
you owe me four hundred dollars
and you kite a check for THIS? and i wave
the bottle of jack in your face yelling I DRINK TEQUILA
you selfish fuck and if you think you're going to
drink anymore in my house
without me
then take your ball of beer out of my kitchen don't even
try to put that mess in my fridge get it out of here
right now so you put
your face in your hands crying daddy
is gonna turn me into an upstanding citizen daddy
said he'd help me but i'm just a ghost now
can't you see that, i need this medicine cuz i'm
just a ghost and i'm lying back in my apartment
hanging from the closet by a belt so i
relent and after you take the ball o beer out
to the jeep, we watch the first episode
ever of the twilite zone on cbs.com
where i, naturally, fall asleep and you
drunkenly
do too. we've been cuddling and my neck
hurts when i get up, push you out
of the couch, say i'm going to bed
do what you want, but you stretch n say think
i'll go home now. in the morning
i think of calling you
to let you know jack's still here in his brown wrapper but
instead, when you call i tell you can have it
when i get my four hunnert dollahs. maybe
the government will bail it out.
comes, you're starting a band with larry the cable guy
who you just convinced to buy
not one but two kick ass guitars ,that
way you can make money giving
him and junior
lessons, make that three guitars
cuz little larry got the matching one for
smaller hands now you're both
celebrating at the porthole
with drinks, he's buying and i'm
negotiating with the eighteen
wheelers outside of alachua, when
will you be back
you insist, are you coming back
tonight? i am currently 300 mi from home
but yes, i'll be there by one a.m. yes i'll call you
when i get there buh bye now, but you can't
wait-- outside of ocala
as i'm stopped for gas at a 7/11 the one
you may have been rescued in that time you ODd on tylenol
and vodka, i dunno it was
before i met you but
the resonance rings
loud as my phone and you sound drunker just
how many
drinks did larry buy you
? don't worry bout that i talked
i got it covered get this larry
is psyched , we are gonna rock you're either with me or
you're left behind you know it's a community
thing, we gotta get together
on this and i'll be there in an hour
and a half dammit
we can talk then but right now i gotta
line of traffic to get back into buhbye
third call
is just outside tampa, the fog is up
at the rest area, it looks like you
sound: misty, dreamlike, full of possible
car wrecks and swirling miracles are you home yet
i gotta come over. twenty minutes seriously
your voice is low and urgent and slurred so ok
i'm home
you stand in the kitchen, the fan revolves sickeningly above
your head, you sway, and sway some more like a man
on a rope you say what you see
in front of you is a ghost. the actual me is back
in my apartment with a bag over his head the actual me
died tonite
you sneer, he's dead. i touch you to convince
you you're lying but you insist no!
i called daddy tonite and daddy's gonna make it
all alright he's taking care of the rent
so i wrote a li'l check to amscottTM and you gotta see
what i bought; disappear
outside
i hear the jeep's door slam, then sounds of clunk
and wrestle from the kitchen window maybe
it's a new guitar, maybe you have a drunken
stirpper, maybe...you struggle with the door handle i could
help but i'm not gonna, i just want to sit
down and smoke a bowl, you
stumble in holding a box
with a round object inside and a tap
on top. you set the ball of beer
down on the floor, wipe blearshifting eyes
go back outside and return with
an unopened fifth of jack daniels, i don't understand
i say, your dad sent you money? NO, you dont LISTEn
to me i told you , i cashed a check at amscot
daddy will take care of me he said he said
and i'll be just like all those other frat boys
in izods & khaki with a fifty
dollar hair cut so
you proceed to try to use your ghosty
hands to insert the tap into the ball o beer but
it's not going in cuz you're too drunk
to see come ON l help me
with this thing but i don't drink beer
you owe me four hundred dollars
and you kite a check for THIS? and i wave
the bottle of jack in your face yelling I DRINK TEQUILA
you selfish fuck and if you think you're going to
drink anymore in my house
without me
then take your ball of beer out of my kitchen don't even
try to put that mess in my fridge get it out of here
right now so you put
your face in your hands crying daddy
is gonna turn me into an upstanding citizen daddy
said he'd help me but i'm just a ghost now
can't you see that, i need this medicine cuz i'm
just a ghost and i'm lying back in my apartment
hanging from the closet by a belt so i
relent and after you take the ball o beer out
to the jeep, we watch the first episode
ever of the twilite zone on cbs.com
where i, naturally, fall asleep and you
drunkenly
do too. we've been cuddling and my neck
hurts when i get up, push you out
of the couch, say i'm going to bed
do what you want, but you stretch n say think
i'll go home now. in the morning
i think of calling you
to let you know jack's still here in his brown wrapper but
instead, when you call i tell you can have it
when i get my four hunnert dollahs. maybe
the government will bail it out.
posted by hiccup at 3:58 PM
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